Halloween, Fall/Harvest Festival...Whatever you call it...I call it Family Fun!

When I was a kid, I remember going a few places to get candy on the night of October 31. It wasn't really a big deal. Quite frankly, being forced to suffer through wearing those hot cheap plastic masks where you had to be stuck with the dampness of your own breath pressing against you wasn't my idea of a good time. Of course, my parents weren't into the whole thing so it wasn't very important anyway.

Then I got to be the parent! :)

I am dramatic by nature. By that I mean, I LOVE to dress up in characters, love being onstage (or pretty much anywhere that I can be a character) and I have a huge imagination when it comes to dressing up. The one thing that I didn't have was money...But I wasn't going to let a little thing like that stop me. Besides, buying a costume at the store meant that you were dressed just like someone else...and I didn't want to be like anybody else! :) So...The tradition started...
My kids have rarely had bought outfits. Their outfits have been made, pieced together and/or gathered on a minimum budget. It started out with the love of a Momma wanting her children to enjoy the fun of dressing up as a favorite character even when I couldn't afford anything. My kids have always seemed to enjoy their creative costumes. If they ever felt bad about it, then it didn't show. In fact, they seem(ed) quite proud to show off their "original" looks.
The kids had their costumes. I had my costume. And, over the years, we were able to convince Daddy to join the show. The holiday became less about the holiday or the candy and more about the family experience. When my youngest daughter got her dog, our list of characters expanded. She insisted that her dog needed a costume as well. And, if her dog had a costume, then the others needed a costume too. (Didn't want anyone to be jealous, right?) So, as our family expanded so did our celebration!

My youngest daughter has had lots of challenges in life. She's extremely creative and talented...although most people never get to see it.
Each year, she gets to pick a character for Mommy to transform her into. (One year she even developed her very own character and I made her vision come to life.) It's so much fun to watch her eyes the first time she tries on the outfit and looks in the mirror! She literally lights up and, at the moment, every hand-stitch is more than worth it! My daughter has a very limited emotional set but, as she sees herself as her hero/favorite animal/etc., I see a spark that is absolutely priceless!

Some years, we do several outfits...which is LOTS of work! This year, she wanted only one...
Even though I had already picked out characters for her Hubby and me, my youngest daughter came up with the idea of superheros. She wanted to be her favorite superhero and her dog would be the sidekick.

The challenge was issued. It was a challenge indeed. #1...We had no budget for this endeavor (as in almost nothing to spare at all). But, there was also the challenge of finding seven superheros that would fit the need. Yes, I said seven! The three of us and then we can't forget the dogs! I went to work finding scraps of material around the house...things that I could destroy in the name of creativity...cardboard, old headbands, toilet paper rolls, old costumes, etc. I gathered together everything that I could find and pushed my creativity to meet the challenge. I ended up needed to purchase only a few items...some small felt pieces, a remnant of red material, some gold ribbon and glue sticks (I ran out!). Then, there were a few clothing items that were purchased and can be worn again...a Superman shirt, red leggings and a red shirt. I think that's everything. I managed to spend so very little...even my hubby was nice enough to expand my budget if I needed. However, I insisted that I do everything on the tightest budget possible. I was a woman on a mission!

I usually schedule a "photo shoot" on October 31. Since the weather is forecasting bad weather, we went ahead and quickly got our costumes on for some very quick photos (before I had to rush somewhere else...covered in glitter...lol!) just in case we didn't get to get anymore later. There are still a few finishing touches that need to be done but you get the idea.

So here's this year's cast of characters ~

I have NO IDEA why this is blue here...It's totally black on my computer and other places.  It looks NOTHING like this!!  :/

Straight from a mother's heart

As my darling daughter sleeps, I am sitting here thinking over how I can make her life better. With tears in my eyes, I overview the past few years and recall the issues that cause my pain. My daughter is different. She learns differently. She acts differently. She is uniquely herself! :)

You see, her learning disabilities were evident to me early. It took me awhile to convince my husband that they were there. Then there was the road to a diagnosis. We had to deal with an inconsiderate teacher who had been informed that we were seeking medical answers for our daughter's learning style but still felt it appropriate to keep harping on the fact that our daughter was "in the bottom of the class," while my daughter played only a few feet away. Then we had to go through a series of all-day tests only to find out that the diagnosis we were given was useless (ADHD with math deficiency). I knew it was wrong. I had experience with ADHD children and knew that wasn't the issue. Our families didn't see it. I was told by one person that I just needed to accept the fact that she wasn't perfect accept the diagnosis. I guess, the fact that I excelled at learning and was raising an older daughter, who was in gifted classes, gave them the right (in their opinion) to (incorrectly) judge my motivation. Who said she wasn't perfect? She was to me! She was perfect just like she was and I wanted the key into her world!!
When I presented our regular doctor with the results, she agreed. She suggested dyslexia. Her office tried to find a way to get her tested and diagnosed officially but the very expensive and hours away testing centers didn't accept our insurance (I hear this is quite common.). It didn't matter. After an indepth study of dyslexia, I cried. The information described her learning so perfectly.
By this point we had decided that homeschooling was best. We had watched our vibrant happy daughter disappear into a shell that didn't even include talking to us. Homeschooling has been such a blessing! I am a former teacher so I had to push myself to combine what I knew with the unknown of a new style of learning. I accepted the challenge with conviction and enjoyed seeing the beauty of every success no matter how big or small.

Now we are once again faced with a challenge. Life has never been easy for my precious one. My heart aches as I see other developmental differences that I feel can no longer be contributed to simply shyness. So, once again, I am faced with the search for another key.
 I feel so alone. It's not that my hubby doesn't support me...but I am the one with the education in this area...I am the one who is with her most of the time...I am the one charged with opening the doors. Sometimes I feel that all I can do is pray... The weight is so much that I don't know what else to do. I feel like the weight of her future is crushing down on my shoulders and I struggle to keep moving forward.

It is this background that leaves me feeling excluded from the world. Everything moves at a different pace for my daughter and me. I immerse myself in her world...and when she is alone...I am alone...

I really wish those around me understood that.

Dear People,

While you were applauding your child for making the football team, cheerleading squad, dance troupe, acting ensemble, pageant winner...I wish you had taught your children to accept those who are different...to embrace the individuality of others...to reach out to those who seem lost. I wish you had taught your child to be kind and see value in those who are unique (in ways that the world might not appreciate) while you were teaching your child to excel where all can see their success.
Instead, you have taught your child to follow the leader. You have taught your child that different is only good when you are better than others. 

I made it a point to teach my oldest daughter not to judge a book by its cover. I taught her not to treat others unkindly because of their clothing, their accent, their skin color or the fact that they were shy. I taught her to appreciate diversity rather than shun it.

You see, I've seen my youngest daughter around others. I've seen how she doesn't follow the crowd so she is left behind. I watch her play by herself and no one reach out to include her. Not only have I watched that, dear adults, but I've seen the looks that I get from you. The looks that scoff me for not raising my daughter to be like everyone else. (Not that I could do that with her unique personality) The looks that blame me because she doesn't act like what they think she should. The looks that label me unfriendly because I don't join in idle chatter...when at that time, it may be that I am the only one befriending my daughter.

Even those who call themselves Christian had rather turn their heads than open their hearts...

My heart aches that WE can't be accepted for who we are. My heart aches that others can't see the wonderful beauty who is my daughter. My heart aches that I can't give her a world that is more friendly to her uniqueness.

My tears flow not because she is different...but because, unfortunately, the world is not...

Signed: A mother's heart