Year End Review

[I’ve written something for this post several times.  Each time I end up trashing it.  Hopefully, this time will work for me.]

At the end of every year, I review the year…what went right…what went wrong.  So...Here goes... 

HEALTH
This year started off heavy.  The negativity of the past several years had gotten me into a very bad place.  My health was paying the price. 
Having PKD (polycystic kidney disease), stress is a major negative factor.  I’ve endured too much stress over the previous few years and my body was telling me.  When my health took a major downturn early in the year, my doctor had to increase my medicine dosage (keeping my blood pressure low normal to protect my kidneys from damage in that area) by four times!  That was a wake-up call for me.


LEARNING CHALLENGES
I’ve been very open about my youngest daughter’s challenges with learning.  In 2013, her social challenges began to be even more noticeable.  I was at the point once again where I had to find another key so that I didn’t lose my daughter to her world of isolation.  We became very educated in the area of Autism/Aspergers Syndrome.  Unfortunately, the medical community (except for a late night conversation with a wonderful doctor off-record) has been basically no help.  At the end of 2014, we still have even gotten an appointment for testing which we were told was requested in August...but I have educated myself and I am actually growing closer to my daughter. 

My youngest daughter on the day that she was recommended for testing in August.  We were given hope...

DIET
Next there was a photo.  I posed for a photo with my daughter before she left for the Father-Daughter Valentine’s dance.  I was sickened by what I saw.  Granted, I had no makeup, unfixed hair, sloppy clothes, the need of a shower and had just completed hours pampering my daughter to get her ready (in addition to a furiously fast moving photo shoot….her patience with the camera is short) but I looked awful!!  What I saw was a pale, unhealthy, unrecognizable version of me.  Not to mention that I felt bad.

One of the better photos of me that day.

That picture and my weight at the doctor’s office set me on the path of health low-fat diet, which helped me shed a few extra pounds and add some color to my face again.  In addition, I eliminated every stress that I could in order to get my body and mind in a better place.


PHOTOGRAPHY
I stopped doing photo sessions for others this year.  Even though we knew it would create a financial burden, I realized that I was working to much for too little.  As a business person, I knew that my dreams in photography were no longer a good investment of time/money.  Sometimes reality doesn’t agree with the heart.  :(

I briefly pursued stock photography.  However, I quickly discovered that I was not having success there.  So, I chalked that one up to an interesting failure.

THEATER
After finishing up 2013 on a theatrical high with SPAC’s production of The Best Christmas Pageant ever, I had to take a break from theater.  Unfortunately, financial and health reasons prevented me from doing what I love.  I have to admit I miss the stage!!!


RELIGION
God has always been a huge part of my life.  In 2014, we left the congregation that had been our home for years and visited a few other locations.  We were actually analyzing our daughter’s reaction to other places.  We hoped to confirm (or deny) whether or not our daughter’s social issues would change with location.  In the end,  she was consistent and she chose to go back to our original congregation.  We finished up 2014 doing the Christmas program together.

Christmas program (Strangers at the Inn) photo taken by my mom

FAMILY
I always enjoy family bonding time.  With so many distractions gone and working together to face the year’s challenges (financial, health, learning, social), we were able to nurture our family bond.

One from our Christmas card photo mini-shoot

When everyone else walks away, those who love you will be there!


HOMESCHOOL
We finished up 5th grade with better learning focus (which was a great thing!).  In August, we started 6th grade in our newly designated classroom.  Then we had a place for our school stuff that we could shut the door on and walk away.  It helped give us some separation.

I was a little overambitious as we started off the new school year but quickly noticed the issue and revamped our schedule.  My daughter reacted positively.  We ended this semester with some very good improvements!

One field trip was to see this WWII ship.

PETS
We lost our beloved 16 year old lab mix (my hubby’s dog before we were married).  That was tough.

"Saying Goodbye"

We added a rescued kitten to our household, Tinker Belle (or Tinker the stinker, as I like to refer to her…heehee).  I  can’t help but smile when I see her tongue-out happy face!

Tinker being Tinker :)

We gave lots of affection and received a lot in return.  Where friendships have gone away, our dogs are always there to make things better!

Halloween family pic

CONCLUSION

Well, there it is.  My year in review. 
While it was a rough year in some ways, it was a great year in other ways.

What made for a Merry Christmas for me ~ Loved ones all together...and having fun!

Here’s to saying goodbye to the negative parts of 2014 and adding to the positive ones in the new year.

The Monster that Haunts Me

It's been over three months since I once again was told that my daughter was recommended for special testing. Once again, I wait. You would think after over six years of this ongoing battle with the medical profession that I would be more used to things...but some days are harder than others...

Today, I reread her initial testing report...

Back in 2007, my daughter was given an evaluation which was done a few days before her sixth birthday. After a whole day of testing, the diagnosis was one that I knew was far from correct. I was disappointed beyond belief. I had reached out for help and had received an improper diagnosis with a recommendation for me to start my daughter on drugs. I had already been disappointed by the coldness (and, dare I say, bullying behavior) of the public school system. Now I was given a diagnosis that it didn't take a fancy degree to know was not correct. When I reread the initial testing report, I see many red flags in addition to pure inaccuracies. What horrible evaluators! How fortunate my hubby and I were to not just blindly accept what we were told.

I reread her initial testing report...
My daughter was disappearing before my eyes and this was the best they could do! I was mad. I was hurt. I was disappointed. I was disheartened. I asked for help and I got less than nothing!


I reread her initial testing report...
...for months. I was so blindsided by such a wrong diagnosis from the people who were supposed to be professionals. It took me months to finally present the report to my family physician. She was as confused as we were. She said that we were right not to act on that evaluation since it was absolutely not right. She introduced us to the world of dyslexia and recommended her for evaluation.


I reread her initial testing report...
...and then looked at dyslexia. I cried. I saw her symptoms all over the place. After weeks of trying to get her in for testing for dyslexia, we were unable to get an evaluation. The insurance didn't cover the cost and the testing was expensive in addition to hours away. We were unable to get the testing that she needed.


I reread her initial testing report...
...then put it away to concentrate on dyslexia. I learned everything I could get. I talked to parents and teachers of children with dyslexia. I took all the advice and knowledge. I confronted her challenges fiercely. I was not going to give up.


I reread her initial testing report...
Something still wasn't right. In fact, some things that had always seemed quirky were now becoming obsessive behavior. Why is she always so distant? Why doesn't she want to relate to others? Why doesn't she liked to be touched? Why am I being asked by people if I had considered autism?!



I reread her initial testing report...
I don't know why.  The feelings of anger, disappointment and everything else come rushing to the surface. It's always so raw.  Why do I do that?  Why didn't they see anything strange?  They were supposed to know.  But they didn't...


I reread her initial testing report...
I appease myself by noting that things have only gotten worse since her initial (and incorrect) diagnosis. Perhaps they needed it spelled out more clearly as it is now.  I remind myself that I have gotten no help at all so far.  I question whether or not to ask again.


I reread her initial testing report...
They were WRONG!  So why do I keep looking at this evaluation?!  I need answers!  I need the TRUTH!


I reread her initial testing report...
There is so much that is wrong with it.  I can see my daughter with my eyes.  I have researched enough that I am convinced that I know what we are facing now.  Should I say anything or not?


I reread her initial testing report...
Her evaluation is SO wrong that I need more answers.  I need to have something that is right.  I need to be able to work with a real diagnosis.  I need this.  I need help.


I reread her initial testing report...
I have been disappointed, yet again, by the medical profession.  My family doctor has recommended another evaluation. This time it's for ASD (autism spectrum disorder/aspergers syndrome). She seems taken aback by the symptoms that are now so glaring.  But that evaluation has yet to come.  It seems no one cares what is challenging my family.  I've given up my job, my hobbies, who I am, everything I can give up to devote myself to understanding her...yet the professionals continue to turn away.  This little girl that I have fought for so long is now becoming a young lady.  I want to enjoy my daughter instead of constantly fight on her behalf.  Sometimes I am mad that I have to do everything by myself.  I had to study her behavior, assess it, learn teaching skills to help her and apply them myself.  I know her so well at this point that I could disappear into her world and never come out...or so I feel some days.
My faith is shattered.  My trust is all but gone.


Today, I reread her initial testing report...
Why, oh why, do I torture myself!!!  The emotions are always the same.  The result is always the same.

I scold myself for reading it again.
I am disappointed in myself for letting it make me feel bad.
It's not that I can't do it by myself.  I have the inner strength to know that isn't true.  I am a force!
It's that I feel that it would be easier if someone with more experience would lead me.  Sometimes easier would be nice.

I want it to go away.
I want to know the joy of having the support of the medical community.
I want to feel that I'm part of the club not standing on the outside.
My silent cries for help unheard.
I want someone to hear my voice!!! 



Today, I reread her initial testing report...
I tuck it away.
I walk away.
I pour my feelings into this blog post.



I will not be controlled by that which I cannot change.
God has promised that He won't give me more than I can handle without his help.  Apparently, He's putting a lot of faith in me and Him!  I should too! :)

And, so, I go back to my life, put my trust in God and leave the nightmare behind me...once again.

Don't judge me OR my dog!

I've seen so many negative posts lately on dogs wearing costumes and clothes in general. Before I post any pics of my dogs in their costumes, here's my vent!

Truth is...I was one of "those people." The people who sat around and thought it was so stupid when I saw a dog wearing clothes. It was so silly that I could never imagine doing that.

Then I got dogs and started responding to my dogs.

My boy dog hated getting wet when it rained. To be honest, I hate wet dog smell myself. So, my dog got a raincoat. No big deal.

My view really changed when I got my girl dog. When we rescued her, she was afraid of EVERYTHING! When we were outside, she was terrified to the point that she wouldn't walk on her own. She would just curl into a ball. Inside the house, she was better (not totally relaxed) but storms reduced her to a quivering mess. We couldn't do anything to help her overcome her anxiety.

Enter the Thundershirt. We bought the shirt to help her during storms...which it does. However, there were situations where the Thundershirt wasn't functional. The Thundershirt is thick and, with a dog who already overheats easily, it was not appropriate for walks around the neighborhood (or vet visits) during hot weather. So, I started looking for other options.
What I found was nothing. So, we started looking at other options. What we found was my dog Fergie's first tutu dress. I made it using a child's garment that was made of stretchy material so that Fergie could have the security of tightness without the thickness of a Thundershirt.

As luck would have it, the dress ended up with a tulle tutu, skirt which began Fergie's preference for tutus.  (Yes, she actually shows her preference...She is much more relaxed in a tutu dress.)  Maybe it's because her tail is like a big pom-tutu!  :D
At this point, we were able to take her for walks!! You could physically see the boost in her confidence when she was wearing her dress. So, that began my mini-hobby of making Fergie dresses. :)  Since I did notice that her confidence was always higher with a tutu on the dress, I always design with that in mind (as well as her comfort, of course). The dresses, in addition to medication, help my dog to live a less stressed life...which also makes my life less stressed. So, it's healthier for her and me. :)

At first, Fergie was the only one we were going to dress. But, my daughter's dog wanted to join in on the fun. He would beg to put on clothes when we would dress Fergie (by the way, she was only dressed when she was going to be in anxious situations where it was needed). Then when he didn't get something to wear, he would try to take her clothes away from her. So, we bought him a shirt which he happily jumps into (literally...It is quite amusing!). Then, he was happy and left her alone.
When the cold weather came, we were happy that he liked clothes because he needed clothes to keep him warm outside. His tiny body shivered something awful during walks and bathroom breaks.

I get so angry reading that people think it's NEVER appropriate or that it's cruel. What is cruel is letting an animal suffer without clothing. It would be cruel of me to be able to alleviate some discomfort and choose not to because of some judgmental comments made by others who don't matter.

So, yes, I do dress my dogs (sometimes....but not frequently).

I say as long as the pet and owner(s) enjoy it...To each his/her own!!

We have four dogs. Two of them have several clothing items because that's what works for them. The two others have a few items (mostly for functional purposes) because they don't mind clothing but they aren't excited about it either. We had one who passed recently at the age of 16 who NEVER wore clothes. Basically, I am responding to the needs of each dog individually...because that's what they are...individual dogs with individual likes and dislikes!

As for "humanizing" dogs...My dogs live in the house!  That alone means that my dogs don't live a life of the wild.  They live a life where they are loved!  Loving and being loved is what counts in my life.  (Besides, why would I try to make my dogs more like humans when dogs make better friends anyway?!)

But if you have to judge, go right ahead...And keep it to yourself! Because I don't live my life catering to the judgments of others...and neither do my dogs! :)

FERGIE IN HER FIRST TUTU DRESS

Oh, yeah...And, yes, my dog's do wear costumes. Their costumes are custom-made by me. They wear them long enough for a photo shoot. Any photo shoots mean extra treats so they are completely thrilled to indulge me for a few minutes. In fact, instead of fighting to get costumes on, we have to fight to get them off of a couple of ours. ;)

One Joy of Pet Parenting

I took this photo yesterday of my pretty smiling boy.

Today, he decides that rolling in ashes first thing in the morning looked like a good idea. 

Ah...The joy! :)

 

Saying Goodbye

Today marks a month since we had to say goodbye to a dear loyal companion.  

Now rest, my sweet boy...

Spook was my hubby's dog, the last of the three pets we owned prior to marriage. My hubby got to experience 16 years with the lab mix puppy that brought home after going permanent at his job. Although he thought he was getting a full black lab, he just never grew into that. He looked like a lab but he was smaller. For that reason, I called him a miniature lab. :)


A SLOW JOURNEY.

A few years ago, we knew that Spook wasn't well. He began having seizures/mini-strokes. He developed arthritis. He would go on binges of not eating. He lost weight. He shrank in size. He stumbled around when he walked. He lost part of his hearing as well as most of his sight. The vet got us on a treatment schedule where we were able to regain some ground but it was obvious that he was growing weary.

At first, he would let me see how sick he was but pretend nothing was wrong when my hubby was around. During that time he would have me hold him. This was unusual since (although I'd loved and cared for him as long as he'd lived with us) he made it very clear that my hubby was #1 in his eyes. Even though I hated that he was sick, I grew to adore, in a way, those moments of connecting with him. .

Unfortunately, those moments didn't last. As the end grew near, he developed dementia. Sometimes he looked at me with confusion as if he didn't know who I was. On one bad day, he even looked at me terror (bringing me to tears). This disease became an emotional struggle as I wanted to stay connected with him so bad but that was slipping away..

For awhile, the "good days" outnumbered the "bad days." He would have spells where things were bad but he'd bounce back and be almost like his old self again. He hadn't given up his desire to chase the cats or roll in the grass. :) Then the bad days started gaining on the good days. He stopped eating again. So, I started cooking for him in an effort to get him to eat. That worked for a little while..

We were all set to enjoy 4th of July weekend, when Spook got sick again. He was having a rough weekend, but we'd seen him do that many times over the past two years. The ups and downs had led us on this emotional roller coaster ride. With that ride, we had developed a continual hope for the good to follow the bad. This time that wasn't going to happen....


LAST DAYS.

We realized that he was slipping away and this time was different..

On Monday, Spook was walking toward his favorite spot in the grass when he suddenly stopped. He turned his head looking confused and unable to complete his journey. Then he collapsed. Scooping his frail frame into my arms, I carried him the rest of the way. (I frequently would carry him when he couldn't go.).

I placed him on the soft grass and watched as his body gave in to his poor condition. I could see that the fight was gone from his eyes. All I saw was exhaustion. I retrieved a blanket for him to rest on (the grass or grass bugs had always made him itch after awhile). Putting myself next to him, I cried. .

Through the emotional pain, my photographer instincts kicked in. If I only had a little while left with him, I wanted to capture as much as I could. So, I went inside to grab my camera. For the rest of the afternoon, I alternated between comforting him when he was awake, allowing streams of tears to roll down my face and photographing every little thing I didn't want to let go of about him. His salt-and-pepper paws, his whitened muzzle, his tail (that had always wagged happily when he ate), the uneven tip of his tail, his paw pads so rough and aged, his lab profile, his floppy ears that were so soft. I tried my best to capture it all the best I could despite the emotional turmoil of the moment..

He barely lifted his head from that point forward. His breathing became labored. It was obvious that he was struggling. So, we spent that night making him as comfortable as we could, showering him with love and saying our goodbyes....

The next morning, my hubby made the call that he was hoping he wouldn't have to make. My daughter said her last goodbyes. As she sat beside him, Spook managed to somehow find the energy to lift himself enough to drop his upper body into her lap...One last expression of the love he had for her..

I finally loaded him into the car seat beside me and gave him his last ride. Over the next hour or so, many tears were shed as my hubby and I watched him leave us. I held onto his finally relaxed body as my hubby prepared a final resting place.

It was a relief to no longer see pain written all over his face.
It was a comfort to know that he could rest now.
It was a blessing to have been his family.
It was the end...The end of a beautiful loving journey with a very special friend.

  In Memory of:

Spook "Jumpy" (Summer 1998 - July 8, 2014)

Meet Tinker Belle

My last post was about three little kittens that we recently took in. The good news is that all the kittens have found homes!  The even better news is that the little sweetie pictured below has found her home in our home. :)

I've actually been wrapped up in my dogs so much lately (plus I have had two VERY unsocial cats for years) that I had become pretty comfortable with not having cats around a lot.  So, I was hesitant to even consider keeping a kitten.  Add to that, the fact that one of my dog suffers anxiety issues and one of her anxieties is cats.  Are you getting the message that I really didn't want another cat?

Even if I did want another cat, it would have to be one with a big purr.  I had to euthanize my cat of 11 years several years ago...kidney failure.  One of the many things I loved about her was her loud purr.  Then when I was diagnosed with asthma, she would lay on my chest when I was having trouble and purr.  As weird as it may sound, that was probably the most comforting thing that I have ever had done for my asthma.  It actually soothed the symptoms.  This factor generally meant that my daughter and I weren't attracted to the same cats.  She went for gray ones (her favorite color) and I looked for the big purr.  

This image was taken just a few weeks after she was rescued and before we decided to keep her.  However, my daughter had an instant connection with this one.  She was so adorable.  But, then again, so were the others.

 

As if the above wasn't enough cuteness to win me over, she starts doing things like this. She liked to lay in my daughter's lap and sleep on her back.  Yes, with the signature tongue out. :)

 It was at this point that I was losing my power to say no.

Then we had a little issue with their overnight accommodations which made it necessary for the three to get a bath.  And I get hit with this look.

 After that it was pretty much over.  She made herself right at home in my daughter's bedroom.

After an indoor trial period, I could see that she was right where she belonged.  (Yes, she even has the big purr!!)

 

How did she get her name?

So, there was now the issue of a name.  Names are somewhat of a big thing to us.  We like names.  We'd given each of the kittens nicknames when they arrived.  (This one was "precious.")  But, if she was going to stay, she had to be given a proper Boles name.  Our pets have full names...first, middle and our last name.  They are family.

When I told my daughter that the kitten could stay, we started thinking on names.  After thinking on it for several days, I decided that we needed to make a choice.  I worked that morning gathering together names that I liked, names that fit the kitten's personality and names that I thought my daughter would like.

I wrote the names on scraps of paper and took them to my daughter.  We sat in her room with the kitten and went through each name, sorting in "yes" "no" "maybe" piles.  The "no" scraps were put away.  The "maybes" were then either kept or moved to the "yes" pile.  Then the "yes" names were each considered.  In the end, it came down to a choice of three names.  One was quickly rejected.  Two were serious contenders...but one easily won..."Tinker!"  From there it was easy to choose a middle name, the only question was the spelling..."Belle" was selected.  So, she's Tinker Belle...Named after Tinker Bell from Peter Pan and Belle from Beauty and the Beast...Tink for short. :)

Oh, and did you notice the little crown I made her for this picture.  

I figure a little princess like her deserves a crown, right? :)

 We ♥ our little Tinker Belle!!

Three Little Kittens

As most everyone who knows me is aware, my family is very animal rescue oriented. We've rescued in many different ways (shelter, rescue, from individuals...even Craigslist, a place I stay away from now). Most of the time it's a case where the animal needs rescue and some type of rehabilitation before finding a new home.

With finances and time becoming more limited, we have been forced to not be as involved in rescuing as we once were. Our family is filled with wonderful rescues and our dedication has to be to our family...including our four-legged members. However, we cannot turn our back on an animal in need if we can help.

That was the case with three little kittens recently. They were born in an industrial area. Mom had several litters at this location and this time the family was getting their walking papers. My husband didn't know what was done with the mother but there were three little kittens left. He was concerned about what would happen to the babies (there's no shelter or animal control where we live) so he called from work and I gave the ok to bring the "little orphans" home.

When they arrived I got out the camera in order to photograph them. What I saw, in interacting with them, were three terrified kittens who were too small to be away from mommy.  (The photos don't even reflect how small, skinny, a little wild/defensive and frightened that they were.)

My daughter immediately clung to the gray one. (Gray cats are her absolute favorite.) 

 While secure in her arms, I noticed that the little one was sticking out her tongue.  I figured it was maybe a nervous reaction.

...But it just kept happening...

...over...

 

...and over again.

I came to realize that this was her special sign of contentment.  Isn't she adorable!?!

So...

Can you guess who found her home with us???  :)

Why I am saying goodbye to photography

(I cannot tell you how many times I’ve written a message like this one so it's time to make things "official.")

When love (or a dream) is involved, costs become clouded. I feel that I’ve been living on that cloud for too long now.

After my oldest daughter moved away, the costs of doing photography for others became more clear. With the mother/daughter bonding element removed, what I saw was many many hours spend catering to my pursuit of photography (studying, research, preparation, emailing, updating, investing resources, editing, etc.). Most of these hours were spent at a computer with my back turned to my family. Many nights I was up so late in order to keep from taking time from my family that I was constantly exhausted. That isn’t the life that I want.

In addition, our family and friends support base has been diminished over the past couple of years. My time became more limited and my shooting opportunities more rare.  I felt myself giving more of myself in life and getting less in return.  After almost 20 years of selfless giving to friends and family in some specific areas of my life, I have found myself surrounded with only my core of loved ones.

So, to be honest, I'm not saying goodbye to photography all together just narrowing my focus in a major way. :)


So what changes am I making? 

As 2014 began, I started working to present my portfolio to a specific agency. I was offered and accepted a contract with that agency in March. I am having to “learn the ropes” but it should offer me the opportunity to shoot things without taking away as much time from my family responsibilities.

At this time, I have decided to reserve my portrait shooting primarily for family. This should still allow me to do what I enjoy without the pressure of satisfying those who are not invested in what I do.

 As a result of this change in focus, I am able to spend less time on the computer (including social media) and more time with those who love me and are present in my life.
As many of you know, I am intensely family oriented. As a mom, a wife and a home school teacher, they deserve the best of me…and they need me more now.

The past couple of years have reinforced things that I hold to be true in my life.
*It’s hard to let go but sometimes holding on is harder. 
*Time is a priceless asset and we can never have enough of it with those who love us (and with those we love). 
*Creativity is a gift. It should be used wisely. 
*Life is about choices and each one comes at a cost…sometimes we just refuse to see the cost. 
*Looking for satisfaction/acceptance outside yourself is only a temporary high. 
*Don’t let that which is most precious to you slip away while you grasp at a dream that may not be yours to hold. 

A big THANK YOU to all those who have supported me…especially my family. I sincerely hope that the images I have done for others have found themselves in homes where they are loved, because I didn’t take lightly the opportunity to capture lasting memories.

I do not rule out returning to shooting for others in the future but now just doesn‘t seem to be my time. I’ve worked too hard for this dream.  It's time to let it go.  I hope my images continue to make people smile.  I hope I’ve made a difference somewhere along the way.
  
If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never meant to be.  ~Unknown

So, with those things in mind, it's off into the sunset I ride... :)

The Importance of The Cake

My youngest daughter has a unique outlook on most things in life. Her birthday is no exception.

When my oldest daughter started having birthdays, I would plan a party every year. When she was young, that meant mostly family. When she was older, that meant for friends. My oldest daughter picked a theme and I designed some decorations and activities for her and her friends.
Then there was the cake. I enjoyed decorating her cakes. Mind you...I am NOT an expert on cake decorating by any stretch of the imagination. It was more about the love. When she was little, I had no money. Therefore, I creatively applied myself to give her decorated cakes and cute decorations. Her parties were then unique. She seemed to enjoy that her parties were different. I hope that was the case.

Then came my youngest daughter. Her yearly birthday celebrations started off the same kind of way...But then it became something else. You see...My youngest daughter's life isn't filled with happily squealing young friends like my oldest daughter's life was. So, that isn't her focus. Her focus isn't even the gifts (although she likes those too). Her focus is the cake.

Like I did my oldest daughter, I would ask my youngest for a theme. She would give me some theme for me to start planning. Early on, she started having an idea what kind of cake she wanted. Every year, she became more detailed about what she wanted. As with my oldest daughter, I poured my love into designing the cake requested.

Finally, her details were an absolute design for what the cake should look like (what kind, icing flavor, theme, what should be included, every little detail). She told me what she wanted and it was up to me to bring her vision into reality. This collaboration became the main focus of her birthday.

She gives me details ~ I incorporate a design ~ and she oversees every detail.

When it's all done, it becomes this visual representation of my love, her ideas and our creativity. I'm looking forward to seeing the final product of where her vision takes us this year. :)

One Home Project Completed

My hubby and I are working on several home improvement ideas at this time. The biggest one being that we are downsizing. We've already given several loads to charity and are still sorting. (Our house is an absolute mess!!)

As my Granny's estate was cleared, I inherited several items. These several small items found places in their new home where they could continue to be appreciated. I enjoyed seeing the items that reminded me of my childhood and my Granny's wonderful taste in decorating take up places in my home.
Then my parents moved from the home that they (as a couple) had always lived...my childhood home. My mom downsized and I inherited more items to find places for in my home. It was almost like my home was becoming more and more special.

Before inheriting the items, my home had been a mix and match. I moved in to my home and brought my stuff. When we married, my hubby added his stuff. Over the years, we'd become a dumping ground of unwanted items, which we happily accepted. Since we didn't have the kind of money to go out and get what we wanted, we accepted what we were given. With my stuff, his stuff, kids stuff, miscellaneous stuff...our small house was getting stuffed!
We had so much that was useful with no real style to the arrangement of anything. Although I worked like crazy rearranging things, I couldn't be satisfied.

But the great thing to happen with my inheritance was that I ended up with items that weren't just functional but I really liked them. I got two lamps. They are beautiful. I would have never purchased lamps because I wouldn't have seen the need to spend the money when I have lights. However, I really like my lamps.
I got some old suitcases. They are probably not something that I'd ever use for the intended purpose but they found a place, with my hubby's antique trunk and suitcase, and became a beautiful stacked arrangement in my living room. An antique sewing machine (which probably doesn't work) became an end table (with one of the lamps on it :) ). Several little decorative items for the wall (which I would never have purchased because I didn't have the excess money) peek out from their places where they fit beautifully into my decor.

Long story but a lot changed and things were moved around...
Then we suddenly found ourselves where we could think about having a dining room table again. (For a few valid reasons, we hadn't had one in years.)
We decided to let the antique theme from the living room spill over into the dining room. We antique shopped until we found a dining set that we liked and had a price that was right. When we brought it home and rearranged that area, there was an empty space on the wall. I tried out several old frames that my hubby had brought home (freebies) over the years. I'd hang them on the wall and debate. Then I found a huge old frame that was stuffed in the back of the closet. I brought it out and hung it. Finally, I found something that I liked. The problem: The images that we were debating on were not ones that we'd want to spend a large amount of money on...and the frame was 24x36!
Then I thought of an image I'd just taken of our daughter. I commented that she looked like a princess. Fancy frame plus my daughter looking like a princess...It was a winner! I saved to get the money to purchase the print. I worked designing the look that I wanted it to have. I repaired the old frame as best I could. I designed the matting that I wanted around the print. I had a vision in mind.

Last night my vision was hung on the wall. :)

My hubby getting a cell pic of our beautiful new wall image.

My vision on the wall.  

(It's picking up more yellow in the upload :(  ...It's really more of a natural black and white but you get the idea.)